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Maid of Honor Speech Weddings

What should a maid of honor speech say?

The maid of honor speech is relatively new to the wedding reception experience and should convey a heartfelt sentiment to the happy couple. The good news for the maid of honor is that there are no set rules for the maid of honor speech. The best man speech seems to carry a bit more weight, and with that, slightly more pressure.

The maid of honor speech should engage and enlighten the wedding guests to the newlyweds as they made their way from two separate people into one couple. Sharing your bird’s eye view of the couple’s journey with humor and emotion will have the best man shaking in his tux.

How long should a maid of honor speech be?

The maid of honor speech comes right before the best man speech. According to hitched.co.uk, The traditional wedding speech order goes father of the bride, groom, best man, and other toasts. However, lots of brides now choose to give a speech, as do the bridesmaids or maid of honour.

If you are including these, the order should go father of the bride, groom, bride, bridesmaids/maid of honour, best man. The best man’s speech always goes last.

The maid of honor has the distinct advantage of a no-pressure deal. Many brides do not request the maid of honor to make a speech. Therefore, a short, less than five-minute speech with a toast does the trick. Better yet, sometimes the speech is given at the rehearsal dinner so your duty will be done before the big day and you can relax!

How do you write a maid of honor speech?

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Please, whatever you do, do not wait until the night before to write the speech. Ladies, do not listen to the best man when he tells you he is just going to wing it. Absolutely not. The maid of honor carries the duty and responsibility to deliver a memorable speech. Break it down into manageable pieces, and it comes together much more straightforward.

  • Introduce yourself. Short and sweet. It is not about you, but you want everyone to know who you are and how long you have known the bride.
  • Start with her, and end with ‘them.’ Share your experiences with the couple from when you knew the bride up until the day she said yes. How did the groom impact her and her life? Them culminate the complete the story with your view of their life as a couple.
  • Raise a glass. Your toast should be 100% you, meaning deliver what best identifies you and your relationship with the bride and couple. Wish them the best, in whatever words and thoughts you feel most comfortable.

Strike a balance of humor and emotion

It is a privilege to be asked to be the right hand ‘soul’ of the bride. Traditionally a best friend or sister is the maid of honor of choice. However, modern times have shown that a man can be in that ‘bestie role’  as the honor attendant or man of honor. In that case, it is a balance of humor and emotion and can highlight the bride’s loyalty to her best friend, whether man or woman.

Be respectful and engaging. If you are the man of honor, share a simple story of your deep friendship and what it means to be in this role. There won’t be a dry eye in the place!

Why should you hire a maid of honor speechwriter?

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At first glance, writing the maid of honor speech does not seem so difficult. You probably think you can Google it or watch it on YouTube. True, but doesn’t the couple deserve your full time and attention on that particular day?

I compose the maid of honor speech with you, not for you. Schedule a free consultation to collaborate on the ideal maid of honor speech. (We work on and practice the delivery too!)

Categories
Best Man Speeches Weddings

4 Ways to Avoid a Cringeworthy Best Man Speech

Gentlemen, you do not want to be the best man who delivers a cringeworthy best man speech, do you? You are asked to speak at a wedding for someone significant to you. A wedding day is arguably one of the most important days in a couple’s life. Whether it is their first wedding or a renewal of their vows, you want your best man speech to be memorable in a good way.

How long is a best man speech?

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We have all been at weddings or events when the speaker overstays their welcome. We have also been engaged with speakers who entertain us, make us laugh, and shed a tear. It can be done.

We recommend the best man speech to be no longer than 4 to 6 minutes in length or about 780 words spoken at a comfortable pace. The bar is set, the monkey is on your back, and you have five minutes to make your words count. How do you do it?

Prepare your best man speech. Winging it does not work.

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I recently spoke with a young man in his late 20’s. Let’s call him Max. Max was asked to be the best man, and with that comes the best man speech or toast. Since they were in middle school, he has known the groom and was very close to the couple who lived in his dorm and met in college. How hard can this be?

The night before the wedding, the bride asked Max about the speech. He assured her he was ready and was simply going to wing it and talk about them and the history they share. The poor bride panicked, and together they mapped out the speech on a napkin. The next day, a nervous and unprepared Max delivered a mediocre best man speech. Always prepare for a speech. It is time well spent, and practice does make perfect.

Be personal and appropriate.

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bride and groom holding beautifully decorated wedding glasses with champaign

My brother-in-law, John, delivered a heartfelt and humorous best man speech. John was a perfectionist and prepared the speech and practiced it numerous times before the wedding. He shared moments early in our relationship as a couple and with him. John’s efforts were well spent and forever memorable.

Sharing personal stories can make a grandmother shed a tear, and a father-of-the-bride realize why his daughter loves the groom. On the flip side, telling tales of late-night fraternity parties or spring break trips to Florida never end well. It is best to avoid:

  • past relationships
  • any form of adult humor
  • negative thoughts about marriage, family, or couple
  • forced humor such as awkward jokes or long-winded stories

If you have even a slight inclination that it may not be a good idea, it probably isn’t.

Do not drink before the speech.

Raising a glass to the happy couple should be enjoyed after your speech. Drinking before will not calm your nerves. Drinking will dull your senses and affect the ability to focus. You have the whole evening to enjoy a spirit or two. I promise it is well worth the wait.

Close with a toast

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The couple chose you to be the best man and represent them, so thank everyone for being there. Close with a heartfelt thought or quote and avoid cliches or trendy ideas. (Do NOT Google best man speech jokes!) Believe it or not, the best man can be so nervous and so caught up in the delivery that they close with a simple thank you and forget the toast. Be confident and raise your glass. Lead their friends and family celebrating with them a toast to wish them the best on this special day.

It is okay to hire a best man speechwriter.

Couples, perhaps you are experiencing a slight hesitation with your best man selection and feel the need for a little one-on-one coaching and some literary assistance to help him through.

The internet may tell you that hiring a best man speech writer will deliver a canned and impersonal speech. That may be true if you…. “complete an online questionnaire, and for $99.13, you will receive a custom-made best man speech delivered to your inbox!”

I don’t work that way. It takes, on average, five hours to write a best man speech. This includes time spent with the best man, with or without the couple too. Understanding the dynamic and the chemistry that aids the creative process. Then we work together to create a flow that is comfortable for the best man to deliver. We practice that delivery too, either in person or on Zoom.

There is no such thing as a bad best man, just an unprepared one that needs a little support and TLC.